Sunday, May 18, 2008  Last update: 14:03 PM, May 18, 2008
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News and Views
Russia accused of annexing the Arctic for oil reserves by Canada
Shareholders warn British Energy that they will reject takeover offers
BAE bosses detained by US investigators over Saudi case
Georgia condemns Russian actions
China praises world's quake aid
Obama plans Iowa trip with victory in sight
Roman Abramovich sets record art transfer

Bush meets Palestinian president
UN to press Burma on aid access
Aid vessel hijacked off Somalia
Nasa hopes for inch-perfect landing on Mars
MI5 linked to Max Mosley sex scandal
Gordon Brown slumps as fightback flops and Tories take 20-point lead
China orders vulnerable nuclear weapon plants to be on disaster alert
Sir Richard Branson: $200 oil on way
Fed's Lockhart says world will feel U.S. slowdown
 
Pakistan Afghan ambassador freed
OECD warning as stagflation goes global
Colombian 'hit' that set off a UK cocaine war
'Plot' delays Tsvangirai return
Venezuela protests Colombian troop "incursion"
France falls for Nicolas's golden boy, Jean Sarkozy
Spain arrests 'prolific' hackers
The Fallacy of Corporate Social Responsibility By Michael Willard (Workplace, The Ukrainian Observer)
Oranges and Lemons…By Peter Dutczyn (Politics, The Ukrainian Observer)
Georgia in Jeopardy (The Wall Street Journal, Review and Outlook)
The battle for Ukraine By John Marone (The Ukrainian Observer)
Archive
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Around the World

In Siberia, Shopping Malls Are Sprouting All Over

Saving Horses One at a Time

Monty Python’s ‘dead parrot’ once lived after all

Cannes, Sweet And Sour

Billions of electronic-eating 'crazy rasberry ants' invade Texas

'Eco-warrior' Prince Philip attacks big families

Is Bordeaux in cartons the last straw for French wine?

It helps to be pretty in politics, says Italian MP

Euro-2012 preparations back on track   Read Sports Ukraine

The Skeptic, The Con and the Happy Hooker Random Notes

"Let's be Honest" -   by John Marone

A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table. He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket toward the man. He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.
”Oh my, I am so sorry,” the woman says as she pops her eye back in place.
Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you,” she says. They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theatre followed by drinks. They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his. She listens. After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast. They had a wonderful, wonderful time. The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings. The guy is amazed. Everything had been so incredible!'You know,” he said, “You are the perfect woman. Are you this nice to every guy you meet?'” “No,” she replies. “You just happened to catch my eye.”
 

Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services.

He gasps to the operator: "My friend is dead! What can I do?" The operator in calm, soothing voice replies: "Take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
Back on the phone, the hunter says, "OK, now what?"

Henny Youngman said…

 

“A doctor has a stethoscope up to a man's chest. The man asks "Doc, how do I stand?" The doctor says "That's what puzzles me!"

 

“A woman says to a man, "I haven't seen you around here." "Yes, I just got out of jail for killing my wife." "So you're single….”

 

“Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it.”

 

“My son complains about headaches. I tell him all the time, when you get out of bed, it's feet first!”

 

“My other brother-in-law died. He was a karate expert, then joined the army. The first time he saluted, he killed himself.”

 

“Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to.”

 

“A Jewish man pulls up to the curb and asks the policeman "Can I park here?" "No" says the cop. "What about all these other cars?" "They didn't ask!”

Ukraine became fully-fledged WTO member today

KYIV, May 16: Ukraine became a fully-fledged member of the World Trade Organization today. A period of one month after the ratification of the agreement on joining the WTO by the Ukrainian Parliament expired precisely today.

It took Ukraine 14 years to become a member of the WTO. In the view of experts, access to new markets, Ukrainian manufacturers' right to defend their export against discrimination and adaptation of Ukrainian legislation to international standards are among the most positive results of Ukraine's joining the WTO. More

President hails UK's support for NATO bid, urges more investment

KYIV, May 16: Ukrainian President Viktor Yushchenko has said that Ukraine values the UK's support for its Euro-Atlantic aspirations. Yushchenko said this during his speech at the Royal Institute of Foreign Affairs, Chatham House.

Commenting on Ukraine's plans to join NATO's Membership Action Plan at the NATO summit this December, Yushchenko said: "We value very much the British side's support for Ukraine's joining the NATO Membership Action Plan in December of this year."

Yushchenko also said that Ukraine's possible accession to MAP does not pose a threat to any country, including Russia. Yushchenko said that joining NATO "falls in line with Ukraine's national interests. We are not seeking to cross Russia's, or any other country's path," he stressed. "We are forming our own idea of security policy," he added. More

Foreign Ministry "surprised" by Russia's entry ban for Ukrainian MP

KYIV, May 16: The Ukrainian Foreign Ministry has said it was surprised by Russia's decision to deny Ukrainian MP Vladyslav Kaskiv's entry to Russia and does not understand Russia's reasons for this.

"The Ukrainian Foreign Ministry was surprised by the detention of a Ukrainian citizen, MP Volodymyr Kaskiv, at Sheremetyevo-2 airport on May 15. It was even more confused by the reasons for the detention: to deny entry to Russia in order to ensure the country's security," the head of the Foreign Ministry's press service, Vasyl Kyrylych, said at a briefing today.

Kaskiv is a member of the propresidential Our Ukraine People’s Self-Defence bloc and has suggested that the Russian secret services were behind the ban. More

President still optimistic about future of parliamentary coalition

LONDON, May 15: Ukrainian President Viktor Yushchenko still believes in the future of the coalition. He said this after meeting British Prime Minister Gordon Brown in London today.

"There is still life in the coalition, it has its own political potential and future," he said. He admitted the coalition is at odds over some issues.

In particular, Our Ukraine does not approve of the administrative regulation of grain and gas prices, he said. "We do not understand the ban on imports of vegetable oil and grain," he said. He said such discrepancies in views can be removed through negotiations.

Yushchenko said that the Our Ukraine faction objects to chaotic privatization and has its own ideas on how to tame inflation. "Such discrepancies can be overridden and simplified within the framework of an open policy and dialogue," he said. More

Foreign minister says status of Sevastopol settled "long ago and for good"

KYIV, May 15: Recent remarks by Russian officials about   Sevastopol and the status of Ukrainian territories have no international legal consequences, Ukrainian Foreign Minister Volodymyr Ohryzko has said.

"Such remarks have no international legal consequences. Whoever speaks about who these territories belong to or do not belong to, these issues have been settled long ago and for good," the minister told journalists in Kyiv on May 14.

The foreign minister said that the remarks by Russian officials are "an attempt to politicize" the situation and "disturb Ukrainian-Russian relations".

"We are against such a policy," the minister said describing the remarks by Russia's representatives as "absolutely groundless". More


Ukraine joins British-French initiative for helicopter modernization

LONDON, May 15: Ukraine has joined the British-French initiative for modernizing of helicopters and for training crews for them to take part in peacekeeping missions, Ukrainian President Viktor Yushchenko told journalists today.

Yushchenko was speaking after his meeting with British Prime Minister Gordon Brown, after which a joint statement was signed. According to the joint statement, Ukraine is to begin its participation in the British-French initiative. The initiative is to increase the number of helicopters which could be used in Afghanistan and other international operations.

"This is a considerable and clear confirmation of Ukraine's ability to be an important agent in developing EU and NATO operational capabilities," the statement reads. More

 

Prime Minister threatens to terminate partnership with President

KYIV, May 14: Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko has threatened to terminate her partnership with President Viktor Yushchenko if the Cabinet's activity is blocked. 


"I warned Yushchenko today for the first time after four months that if things continue this way, I will be no longer a partner and an ally," Tymoshenko said at a rally with the residents of the capital’s Podil district on May 13.

She added though that "the coalition will not be re-formatted".
Tymoshenko emphasized again that Parliament has still to approve a package of anti-inflationary laws submitted by the Cabinet two and a half months ago. More

 

Ukraine limits Gazprom subsidiary's licence to sell gas

KYIV, May 14: The Ukrainian national electricity regulatory  commission has limited from five to one year the validity of the licence to supply gas at a free price issued to the subsidiary of Russia's Gazprom, Gazprom Sbyt Ukraina, the commission's resolution No 547 of April 24 2008 states.

Gazprom and the state oil and gas company Naftohaz Ukrayiny signed an agreement on March 12, according to which, starting from April 1 2008 Gazprom Sbyt Ukraina would annually supply at least 7.5bn cu.m. of gas to Ukraine's industrial consumers. More

 

OUPSD bloc accuses Prime Minister of plotting with opposition

KYIV, May 14: The propresidential Our Ukraine-People's Self-Defence Bloc has said that the blocking of the parliamentary rostrum on May 13 by the Yulia Tymoshenko Bloc resulted from a plot with the opposition Party of Regions aimed at amending the Constitution of Ukraine and that it was also caused by the Cabinet's inability to curb inflation.

The OUPSD expressed bewilderment that the YTB had prevented President Viktor Yushchenko from making his annual address to Parliament, which was his constitutional duty, the bloc's press service said.

"We think there are two reasons for doing this. First, the inability of the Cabinet's finance and economic bloc to tackle inflation; and second, a plot between the YTB and the Party of Regions aimed at amending the Constitution. Quite apart from the transfer of power to an unstable Parliament, this will threaten the very existence of Ukraine as an independent state," the statement said. More


Tymoshenko says energy company Vanco wants to resell Black Sea gas field

KYIV, May 13: The US energy company Vanco is holding talks with Russia's Gazprom about the resale of its section of the Black Sea shelf, Prime Minister Yulia Tymoshenko has said.

She told a briefing in Kyiv that "talks on the resale of the shelf are being held now, with Gazprom participating."

Tymoshenko said that the Ukrainian sector of the Black Sea contains up to 1.5 trillion cu.m. of gas, which is 30% of the country's energy resources.

"The estimated value of this resource is 450bn dollars," Tymoshenko said. "This is the biggest treasure for safeguarding Ukraine's energy balance and security."

Tymoshenko expressed surprise that the 12,960 sq.m. Kerch section of the Black Sea shelf "had been handed over to one company". "Ukraine is now deprived of the best, the most effective part of the Black Sea shelf," she said. More

 


 

Markets     u.s. Close  5/16      EU Close 5/16

Dow 12,986.80 -5.86 -0.05%
NASDAQ   2,528.85 -4.88

-0.19%

S&P  1,425.35 +1.78 +0.13%
FTSE 6,304.30 +52.50 +0.84%
DAX 7,156.55 +75.50 +1.07%

Ukrainian flag

Read the Political musings of Columnist Peter Dutczyn, 'Oranges and Lemons...'   

“A long habit of not thinking a thing wrong gives it a superficial appearance of being right.”

“A thing moderately good is not so good as it ought to be. Moderation in temper is always a virtue; but moderation in principle is always a vice.”


“All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit.”

“An army of principles can penetrate where an army of soldiers cannot.”

“Arms discourage and keep the invader and plunderer in awe, and preserve order in the world as well as property... Horrid mischief would ensue were the law-abiding deprived of the use of them.”

“Belief in a cruel God makes a cruel man.”

“But such is the irresistible nature of truth, that all it asks, and all it wants is the liberty of appearing.”

“Character is much easier kept than recovered.”
Thomas Paine

Can bald people get a hairline fracture?

Mistakes are made from time to time. Without them, some of us would have never been born!

If you get mono twice, isn't that stereo?


I slept through the alarm this morning. Good thing it was only a small fire.

 

A cheetah clone was found slain at the city zoo. Police suspect a copycat killer.

I know what people are thinking as soon as I tell them that I'm psyhic


If we ever figure out how to preserve people, we'll really be in a jam.

 

Doctor: "I have good news and bad news." Patient: "What's the good news?" Doctor: "You have 24 hours to live." Patient: "What's the bad news?" Doctor: "I should have called you yesterday!"

If you're on a cruise, you're with newlyweds, over-feds and nearly deads!


How many men does it take to open a beer? None, it should be open when she brings it to you.

Patient: "Doc, you have to help me. Some days I think I'm Mickey Mouse, some days I think I'm Donald Duck" Doctor: "How long have you had these Disney spells?"

I'm a big sports fan. I keep the athletes cool while they're playing.

 

I have three beautiful children. I have four children, but only three are beautiful.

Donald Rumsfeld briefed President Bush this morning. He told Bush that three Brazilian soldiers were killed in Iraq today. The color ran from Bush's face, and he was visibly shaken. Bush composed himself and asked Rumsfeld, "Just exactly how many is a brazillion?"

BUSINESS FACTS

A meeting is an event at which the minutes are kept and hours are lost.

If you tell your boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

When you try to prove to someone that something won't work, it will.

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